Letters Patent and Donut Commission.
Morpheus636, By the Grace of the God Emperor of Tutorials,
Suspicious Donut Sales Manager of Suspicious Donut Sales Inc,Moderator of the Cult of Theta, Duke of Donut Land, Earl of Kool Aid,Baron of Bear Claw, Lord Commissioner of Welcoming, Gentleman Usher of the Danish, Honorary Lord Keeper of Honorary Titles, Supreme Commander of the God Emperor’s Enforcement Corps, Protector of the Fry Cake, Priest of the Most Ancient and the Most Noble Order of the Golden Sprinkle, and Knight of the Most Noble Order of the Dark-Colored Cumerbund. To the members of the Donut Club, Greeting. Know Ye, that we do declare our will and pleasure as follows.
Whereas, the applicant has declared his intentions to become a donut salesman.
And Whereas, The Donut Second-in-Command has given his Advice and Consent to the application, on the condition that the applicant complete the sale of ten-million donuts before being released from his position.
Therefore, reposing special trust and confidence in his (lack of) integrity, prudence, and ability, We do designate Jeyman to the post of Donut Sales Apprentice, and We do authorize him to execute and fulfill the duties of this office with all the powers and privileges, and subject to the conditions prescribed. Thus, We have made, created, and commissioned, by these, our letters, Jeyman, a Donut Sales Apprentice.
In witness whereof, we have caused our letters to be made patent having hereunto set our hand and seal, witnessed ourselves on the seventh day of the month of August in the year of our God Emperor two hundred thirty eight.
Signed, Morpheus636, by his own hand, and affixed with the great seal.